Reflections

There have been oh-so-many puddles in England this summer. I thought it might be appropriate to take a minute to peer into one of them and reflect before I cross the pond once again.

It’s true that in many ways England and the United States are very similar places. Both are “western” nations and English speaking, and many things transfer from one country to the other – we got “The Office;” they got “The Simpsons.” But there are still so many ways in which Britain is a foreign country to me and there are things that I think a person can learn about himself through foreign travel. Ugly as they are, I believe I’ve become a bit more mindful of some of the prejudices I hold about any number of things, particularly related to nationalism. I have found myself in conversation about foreign affairs with people here and found myself immediately defending the United States and being quite proud of where I come from. On some level I think it is important to hold a level pf pride concerning your heritage, but upon reflection it seems that there aren’t always valid reasons for that pride or defense of our country. I don’t think it was really necessary to travel abroad to find other points of view, but being in this kind of a situation certainly does force it rather quickly. There really is no avoiding it when you leave your own country. I do think it’s necessary, even as Americans living in the United States, to be critical of our government’s policies, regardless of political affiliation. It seems all too easy to avoid this responsibility, however, if you never leave the country. This is especially crucial for us as Christians, I believe, since our nationality, ultimately, belongs to the Kingdom of God and not to any particular political body. If we are to then live responsibly where God has placed us, we must maintain a critical eye towards the nation we live in, not only for our own sake but for those around us as well.

There have been various times in my life when I’ve gone on these short-term opportunities - periods in which I know for certain that my time in a certain places is limited, that there is a fixed date for my departure. Working at a summer camp on three different occasions was similar to that. In those situations, it seems that your sense of “mission” is heightened. There is no question that you are in that place for a specific time for a specific purpose and it seems easier to maintain that focus. The same could be said for my time here in England. Knowing that three months was all the time I was afforded here, I think I was quite intentional about the way I interacted with people and the way I went about my work for Green Street Green. Now, as I return home, I wonder if I might be able to maintain that same sense of concentration in what I do in the States – a more definite sense of purpose in my schoolwork, in my relationships, in my church, and so on.

Finally, it was a great personal encouragement being here with these people. One of my bigger questions going into this experience had to do with my vocational goals. I was quite unsure of the way to proceed after seminary. Yet I’ve received a lot of encouragement from those here to pursue a career in teaching, which had been one of my considerations. Of course, I don’t know yet where I’ll do that – whether in secondary schools, colleges, or the local church – but in any case, it will be in the service of the Lord and His Church.

I do also want to give a hearty wish of gratitude to all of you who have kept up with my adventures in England, who have prayed for my time here, and who have offered words of encouragement from time to time. This has been a real blessing. I do look forward to coming back home, but I think I will always look back on this summer positively. Thank you all for helping with that. And if you could, please pray the next couple of days that my flight home would be smooth and safe. I'll see you all soon.

Soul Survivor

I ought to say a few things about my week at Soul Survivor, the largest youth festival in Britain. I'm thinking it's going to be somewhat difficult to do simply because there seem to be in my brain so many things I could say about it. Regardless, let's see where we get.

First, a brief description of the event. 10 or 11 thousand teens and youth workers descend on the Royal Bath and West Showground in Shepton Mallet, Somerset. It's in the middle of nowhere, but where else are you going to facilitate that many teenagers? Everyone camps throughout the week, which revolves around two-a-day meetings - one at 11:00 am, one at 7:00 pm - with seminars available in the morning and afternoon.

A typical meeting might go something like this: announcements to get people updated on any scheduling changes, followed by a short talk highlighting a specific ministry, like Slum Survivor, an initiative to get young people thinking about and raising money for the one billion people who live in slums all their lives; or a variety of gap year opportunities, in which a teen can spend a year working in ministry abroad before going off to university. Next, a lengthy set of worship music begins, usually lasting 30-45 mins. These are the main focus of the event, as the church that started Soul Survivor is the church from which Matt Redman ("Heart of Worhip," "Blessed Be Your Name") and Tim Hughes ("Light of the World [Here I Am to Worship]," "Beautiful One") came. In fact, Tim Hughes led a few of the worship sets and he is very good. After the first set of music, who knows what might happen. There was always a talk scheduled, but often the Holy Spirit would start working on people before the music stopped and so the talks were delayed to give room for God to do whatever it was He was going to do. More on this later. The talk that followed probably went for 20-30 mins and focused on the theme, "Into His Likeness" (the "likeness" being Jesus', since that's kind of the goal of Christianity, for people to be transformed more and more into Jesus' character [Rom. 8:29]). Next, another worship music set would follow and this was more or less indefinite. That is, it could have gone on all night so as to again give room for the Lord to what He was going to do in people (again, more on this later).

So that's more or less what it looked like. It also looked damp and dreary and chilly (at least for summer). It rained every day. One morning it was sunny, but when we left the morning meeting at 12:30, it was raining again. By the way, I've quit looking at the sky and asking "Why is it raining?" and instead started saying "Of course it's raining." We did have a caravan that we used to store food and cook meals and an enclosed awning in which to eat. And I think most of our stuff stayed dry in our tents, so the rain really didn't bother us much.

OK, now what really happened last week? Well, I think I can say with confidence that God met with each of us on some real personal levels. Each of the young people that came along with us were definitely touched at one time or another and certainly Penny and I were as well. And here's where the "giving space to God" thing comes in. I'll try to explain as best I can for those who may read this and wonder what I'm talking about.

I don't know if I could articulate it perfectly from a theological perspective, but when we worship Jesus, stuff happens (how's that for theological language?). I think what it comes down to is that when we worship and give wholehearted praise to the Lord, we do something like opening doors to our heart that give permission for the Holy Spirit to come and "sort us out." I think anyone who has done any kind of work with people long-term understands that at the core, people rarely change, especially by our own efforts. But this is something that our Creator does exceptionally well, especially if we give Him room to do so. So in worship, it's like inviting Him to rearrange our attitudes or heal our scars or our pain or do whatever else He knows needs to happen to further conform us into Jesus' likeness.

At the Soul Survivor meetings, this didn't necessarily have to happen in conjunction with talks or sermons, it was just through the praising of our God. You see, we'd be singing at the top of our lungs for 30 minutes or so and then you'd start hearing people here and there crying or screaming and you knew that the Holy Spirit was starting to heal old wounds as a surgeon might work on our physical bodies, which is likewise briefly painful (but for good reason). And as this started to happen, we simply prayed that God would continue and do more. And sure enough, it wasn't long before more people would be touched by the Lord. What's really remarkable, I think, is that none of this was at the prompting of those running the meetings. There was literally no coercion involved.

Maybe I can describe this better with a personal story. For most of the week, I was blessed simply by being able to praise God loudly and freely without having to have anything prepared ahead of time (I had been leading worship regularly at church for the last year, where I'd have to have some kind of responsibility during church - it can be difficult to worship and lead at the same time, but not impossible). If that's all that had happened, I'd have been satisfied. But on the last night, in which there was no teaching, I simply asked God what, if anything, He had for me. Background interruption: for many reasons, I think I've consistently had problems approaching the Lord as a loving and gracious Father, as He is described in the Bible. This, I think, has also affected the way in which I interact with male authority figures. I can do it on a business level, but it's difficult for me to do that relationship on a personal level. Back to present: shortly after I prayed, I found myself whispering to myself or to God or both, "Don't leave me Father, don't leave me Father," again and again. Before long I found myself weeping, but not with sadness. Rather, I think it came from an overwhelming realization that indeed He wouldn't and that at that moment He was in the process of wrapping His arms around me in a way that made it possible to trust Him with my tears. I'm not exactly sure how long this went on. 30 mins? 45? I don't know. But when I finally opened my eyes, I just felt lighter. It's that simple. When that process began, I could tell that a few people had gathered around me to pray for me even though my eyes were closed, but none of them prayed out loud. None of them knew what it was I was going through. I'm confident that all they really prayed was that God would keep up whatever He was doing, giving Him room to work.

Anyway, that's a quick glimpse of Soul Survivor, which has certainly been one of the highlights of this season in England. The pictures included are one of the meetings and a few of the youth that came from Green Street Green. I come home in a week, so I'll try to post again this week with some broad reflections. Peace.